It’s a given: People who are well-groomed and well-dressed make a good impression. Here’s a case of taking that premise to its absurd conclusion.
Swiss banking giant USB AG recently released a 43-page dress code, setting down rules on everything from toenail clipping (to extend the life of socks and pantyhose) to bad breath (stay away from the garlic and onions).
The missive, released in December, has gathered guffaws since its appearance — to the point where the company has decided to pull it in favor of a “more modest booklet,” according to an Associated Press story.
A few more highlights of the original version:
- retail bankers are expected to wear suits in navy blue, dark gray or black — colors that “symbolize competence, formalism and sobriety”
- wearing watches is recommended — they suggest “reliability and care for punctuality”
- women are advised to wear skin-colored underwear
- female employees who die their hair are encouraged to do so regularly, so the roots won’t show
- older male employees are warned off dye jobs, because the “artificial color contrasts excessively with the actual age of your skin,” and
- over-the-calf socks are recommended for men, to avoid the heartbreak of exposed skin when the individual sits down.
After the laughing died down, UBS officials said they’d be revising the handbook. “We’re reviewing what is important to us,” a bank spokesperson sniffed to AP.
Bet a sense of humor isn’t on that list.