The 1 job HR really dreads: How to survive a termination meeting

No one likes to do it, but for HR personnel and managers it’s part of the job: Sometimes, and despite their best efforts to make things work, they have to let people go.

As stressful as a termination meeting can be for the departing employee, it can also produce significant stress levels for the staffer who has to deliver the news – whether that’s an HR person, a manager or a combination of the two.

And when there are signs that the employee is going to take the news particularly badly, the stress level for everyone gets ramped up another notch.

Fortunately, there are some specific steps that can be taken to ease the blow – not just for the terminated employee but for those whose job it is to deliver the bad news.

Here are some keys to making that difficult conversation go as smoothly as possible.

Step 1: Prepare

First, prepare for the meeting carefully and thoroughly. If performance expectations and declining performance have been clearly communicated and documented – as they should be – the termination should not come as a complete shock to the employee. And an employee who sees the writing on the wall is likely to be better prepared to handle the termination meeting civilly and professionally.

Preparing for the meeting includes gathering all relevant documentation supporting the decision to terminate. This includes past disciplinary warnings and any other documentation that backs the termination decision.

OK, so you’ve got your documentation ready and it’s time to deliver the news. What’s the best way to go about it?

Keep it short

Experts recommend keeping the meeting short – some say to try to get through it in as little as 10 to 15 minutes.

At the same time, you don’t want the person to feel like they are being rushed. Give them time to vent, and if they ramp up the emotional level don’t respond in kind. Stay calm, professional and direct, and stick to facts. Show compassion and empathy.

This does not mean, however, that you should try to soften the blow by complimenting the worker’s job performance. Doing so can backfire in a big way, giving the employee ammunition for a claim that the termination was unlawful. Think about it: If their performance was good, why were they let go?

Expert: Give prior warning

One of the most important tips to remember, according to Jon Hyman, an employment law attorney with Wickens Herzer Panza in Avon, Ohio: Don’t fire someone without first delivering a prior warning. The fired employee should not be blindsided by the news of their termination, Hyman says. It’s also a good idea to have a witness in the meeting to take notes in case the ex-employee ends up suing, Hyman adds.

Getting it wrong can be costly for employers. In one case, the EEOC sued a Florida grocery store, alleging that the store illegally discriminated against a 57-year-old cashier by terminating her employment based on her age. According to the lawsuit, at the time of the termination the employer’s general manager told the employee, “Look, old lady, we have to give opportunities to new people. … It is time for you to rest.”

Here’s a Captain Obvious alert: That is not something to say at a termination meeting. The store settled the case by paying $20,000 and taking other remedial action.

Key points

In sum, here are some key points to keep in mind that can help to make an employment termination meeting go as smoothly as possible:

• Prepare thoroughly for the termination meeting.
• Have relevant documentation on hand.
• Keep the meeting short, and get to the point quickly.
• Be direct, empathetic and respectful.
• Do not become emotional.
• Give the employee space to vent, and then end the meeting.

Termination meetings are never easy. But following these key steps can make them a little less stressful for everyone involved.