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They Want a Promotion: How to (Gently) Tell Them ‘No’

Michele McGovern
By: Michele McGovern
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About the Author

Michele McGovern writes. A lot. These days, she covers HR, digging deep into company culture, DEI, leadership, management and the everchanging world of work. In the years between getting a BA in journalism from a state school and writing about HR, she wrote about big-city crime for a wire service and small-town life for local newspapers. She’s a mediocre mom, decent wife, wannabe athlete and consummate pursuer of fun - on land, snow and water. Find her on LinkedIn @michele-mcgovern-writer.

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Last Updated: October 17, 2025
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One of the more uncomfortable situations managers find themselves in is denying a promotion to an employee who has applied for a higher position.

What’s worse: The employee has shown an interest in improving his or her status and the company. That makes it doubly hard to deny the request, even when there are good reasons for doing so.

Denying a Promotion

You know the employee isn’t going to take it well when you deny them the promotion. So, it takes some deft handling to deliver the news.

Follow these steps when declining a current employee’s promotion request. It’ll help you maintain a good relationship and keep the employee who might be a fit for another promotion in the future.

1. Take the Meeting

When an employee asks to meet about the new role, or just applies for it if you have an internal mobility program, take the meeting even if you don’t think it’s a good fit.

The employee has gone out on a limb and dared to ask for more work and responsibility, or even just a change of pace. To reject it outright sends a demoralizing message.

Have a full discussion. Listen to what the employee might bring to the table. People rarely will ask for a position they don’t feel they’re qualified for. The employee may know something you don’t!

2. Don’t Look Back

Don’t get hung up on prior work history. This sounds counterintuitive, but it helps you keep a more open mind about the employee’s proposal — and the concrete reasons you’ve decided against it.

If the employee is your direct report, they might remember mistakes made in the past and get the impression that this clouded your judgment in deciding not to grant the promotion.

Stress to the employee that you approached the request with a clean slate. Let them know you considered what they contributed to your team in the past, and focus on the strong points.

This reassures your employee that you considered them fairly when compared to other applicants.

3. Set Up a Meeting

When it’s time to make the actual rejection, do it in a meeting.

When you consider internal candidates, you don’t want the news that they didn’t get the promotion to come via an impersonal email.

Set aside a brief face-to-face to explain why the employee didn’t get the job.

4. Give Honest Feedback

This isn’t the time to gloss over why the employee didn’t qualify for the job. The employee expects an answer, so be frank about why they fell short. Tell them where they were strong, but why they didn’t beat out the other person. Help them recognize how they can be a stronger candidate in the future.

If the answer came down to they were qualified, but the other person was just a stronger candidate, then it’s fine to be specific about the ways the other person was better matched.

5. Pump Them Up

Reinforce what the employee is doing well. This not only softens the blow. It also points out to the employee that they are valued in their current position.

If you’re the employee’s direct manager, express what they mean to your team, and be specific about why and what they do well. Offer to talk about other ways you can work with the employee that would prime them for future professional growth.

If you’re not the employee’s direct manager but were nevertheless the one who made the decision, gather some feedback from the employee’s manager and team members on the positive difference they make.

6. Keep Up the Encouragement

Probably the last thing the employee will want to hear is, “While you didn’t get this promotion, there could be others!” But you still must emphasize that’s the case.

Depending on how long the employee has been at the company, there could be other opportunities you can point out that the employee may not have been aware of.

Stress that this setback shouldn’t keep the employee from continuing to improve — and work to turn that “We’re sorry” into “You got the job!”

What’s the real point of cushioning the blow when rejecting an employee for a promotion?

If you value the employee’s efforts and contributions, you obviously don’t want them to leave. Be clear that the rejection doesn’t mean all roads to higher levels are stopped, and encourage them to try again.

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