Workplace Romance: 3 Keys to Handling Love in the Office

Valentine’s Day brings workplace relationships into focus. Office romances introduce risk, especially when authority, pay, or performance decisions are involved.

How common are workplace romances — and how should HR respond?

The Current State of Office Romances

As it turns out, workplace romances are more common than some folks realize, according to Monster’s 2026 Workplace Relationships report.

In fact, 40% of respondents say they’ve had a crush on a co-worker — and 27% admit they’ve had a romantic relationship with a co-worker.

Moreover, 13% say they’ve had a crush on a manager — and 6% admit to having an office romance with a manager, highlighting the added risk when personal relationships involve reporting or decision authority.

Taken together, the findings point to a simple reality: workplace relationships happen, whether company policies anticipate them or not. Flat-out bans on workplace romance are hard to enforce and often counterproductive. You don’t want to lose valuable employees over outdated employee fraternization policies.

And as an FYI, California employers can’t ban workplace romances. Under the California Labor Code, an employee’s personal life outside of work is protected, and employers aren’t permitted to make disciplinary decisions based on after-hours conduct – including romantic relationships with co-workers. Having said that, of course, employers can prohibit inappropriate behaviors in the workplace.

Attorneys Share Best Practices for Managing Office Relationships

To preempt such problems, employment law attorneys Meredith Campbell and Joy Einstein of the Shulman Rogers firm recommended the following strategy to handle workplace romance.

First, recognize that romance in the workplace does happen. Work is where many people spend most of their waking hours, and as the old saying goes, sometimes you love the one you’re with. That said, it’s important to implement rules prohibiting romantic relationships in certain situations — for example, between a boss and a subordinate. 

If there is no power dynamic between the individuals in the relationship, your primary concern is to ensure that the relationship is and remains consensual, Einstein said. 

You might want to consider a signed document, often referred to as a relationship contract, a “Cupid Contract” or a love contract, that confirms both parties consent to the relationship and acknowledges that either can leave the relationship with no adverse impact at work, according to Campbell.

Love contracts matter most when workplace romance intersects with authority, pay decisions, performance reviews, or reporting lines.

What’s in a Relationship Contract?

Campbell and Einstein said that a well-crafted relationship contract:

• Prohibits retaliation of any kind.
• Includes a reminder that if either party feels like an action violates the company’s anti-harassment or anti-discrimination policy, then they should let HR know so the company can investigate and take appropriate action.
• Stipulates that if the relationship becomes a distraction for co-workers or if things change so that both employees can’t remain in their current role, the company reserves the right to transfer or terminate employment for either or both employees. 

FAQs for a Workplace Romance Disclosure Policy

If your company decides to implement a Workplace Romance Disclosure Policy, your HR team will need to consider the following questions.

1. At what point does the relationship have to be disclosed?

Campbell and Einstein recommend encouraging early disclosure to HR, before a relationship intersects with reporting lines, performance reviews, or pay decisions. HR does not need to know about every personal interaction, but once a relationship could affect authority or objectivity, disclosure should occur.

HR expert contributor Jackie Plunkett notes that office rumors often trigger the introduction of a relationship contract when employees delay coming forward.

2. How do you help employees feel comfortable disclosing a budding relationship?

Campbell and Einstein say HR needs to establish trust so employees understand disclosure will be handled professionally and without judgment. Plunkett adds that while some employees may hesitate to sign a relationship contract, the agreement protects both the employee and the company by clearly setting conduct expectations and boundaries.

3. What if the relationship doesn’t work out?

Campbell and Einstein say HR may need to meet with both employees to determine whether a transfer or role change is necessary — with voluntary moves preferred when possible.

And Plunkett notes that when expectations are set up front and documented, many employees can continue working professionally after a breakup. A well-crafted agreement helps reduce confusion and protect all parties if the relationship ends.

The bottom line, according to Plunkett, is that the contract still offers protection for all.   

True Story: An Employee’s Take on Relationship Contracts

A few years ago, a friend of mine had just been promoted to an entry-level management position. In that role, part of his job duties involved going to job fairs and validating new candidates. At a job fair, he was impressed by a candidate and recommended her for an interview. Ultimately, the woman was hired for a position in another department.

Over the next six to nine months, my friend chatted with the woman at work. And then they started talking outside of work. As things progressed, they kept their relationship on the down-low for a while. When the holidays rolled around, they knew that they were going to be making family introductions and posting photos on social media. And becoming “Instagram official” meant the news about their relationship was going to get out.

My friend and his then-girlfriend (spoiler: now wife!) reached out to HR and explained their dating situation. In response, the company had them sign a contract stating that their relationship was consensual and that they’d behave professionally at work. It also stipulated that the two couldn’t work together or for each other on the same team.

An Employee’s Perspective: Pros and Cons of a Contract 

I asked my friend if he had any reservations about signing, and his answer was pretty interesting. He said no, he didn’t have any reservations. Mostly, he felt relieved that the company took the news so well. He was able to keep his job and his salary, which made him really happy.

He also felt like the contract provided a layer of protection at the office. Because the contract stipulated that he couldn’t work with his girlfriend, he didn’t have to deal with perceived favoritism by other employees. They weren’t working on the same team, so it never became an issue.

He quickly realized the contract also had another benefit: It provided a layer of protection for the relationship. The prohibition against working together meant that they weren’t making day-to-day decisions about each other’s jobs, which he said could’ve caused a strain on things.  

Next, I asked my friend what, if anything, in the contract would’ve been a dealbreaker for him. After thinking about it for a minute, he said anything that might’ve seemed to limit either of their career paths or restrict their ability to rise through the ranks of the company. He also said he wouldn’t have liked a clause that limited their ability to attend company events together, such as inter-office parties and happy hours.

As a final thought, he added that the relationship strengthened their ties to the company. They had a shared focus and interest that grew at work – and several years later, they got married.  

That outcome wasn’t accidental. It was shaped by clear expectations and guardrails set by HR.

Banning workplace romance is unrealistic and often ineffective. Clear disclosure rules and well-designed relationship contracts give HR a way to manage authority, performance, and fairness risks before problems arise. When expectations are set early and documented, organizations are better positioned to protect employees and decision integrity, regardless of how a relationship unfolds.